Love is relative. I sensed a friend who asked the title question was focused on the love between people, but I thought it through from the big picture encompassing all love and in all meanings of the word I believe it is strongly based on how something or someone makes us feel. I think that we are all self-motivated if we can we strip away the political correctness and education about "how to be good" we get growing up. Even those who are powerfully altruistic find great joy in the act of giving and helping others. We may not want to see it that honestly for it can be viewed as selfish, but it is only selfish if it is not honest. Honesty and love make us very vulnerable and that risk can distort our perceptions, blocking love we might want to give or receive and giving or accepting as love that which may not actually be love. Within the fear of the risk of loss, in this life, most of us have little time each day to stop and feel and share the stillness inside where love comes from. Too many give up and settle for less depth and quick emotional rushes.
For instance, when I click "Love" on Facebook, I sometimes am sending a hug from the deepest part of my being and sometimes I am loving the idea someone shared. It can be an easy and perhaps diminished experience of love as is many online or offline experiences can be in our world today. That may be all some people want out of love, to hear (or read) caring words. Some want complete immersion of every facet of being and life, a sense of two beings becoming one (and believing that can happen is not always easy in this world as I've been there and have the scars to prove it lol). Ultimately, I believe love is an individual experience and that experience defines love for that individual. Two who share the same experience share the deepest love.
At least that is my experience, so right or wrong, it's right for me.
